Today's Joke

[keithgood838]

Slightly less boring Robert,
and easier to stomach.

[keithgood838]

PROXY PILLS

A woman goes to the doctor to get some medication
for her elderly husband. She is given some pills and
is told that he should take two every Sunday, Tuesday
and Wednesday and skip the remaining days of the week.
A month later she returns to tell the doctor that, alas,
her husband has died of a heart attack.
'I don't understand,' bewails the doctor, 'his heart hasn't
bothered him before.'
'Oh no,' exclaims the wife,' the pills did him good,
it was the skipping that killed him.'

[karl]

As long as they never say Viagra you'll be alright!!!

[keithgood838]

Let's maintain the medical motif:

SCARY SURGERY

A patient was seen running along a hospital corridor
shortly before his operation.
'What's the matter?' enquired the concerned ward sister.
He gasped: 'I just heard a nurse say,"It's a very straightforward
operation. Don't worry. I'm sure it will be all right."'
'She was simply trying to comfort you,' said the sister
re-assuringly, 'what's so terrifying about that?'
The trembling patient replied: 'She wasn't talking to me;
she was talking to the surgeon.'

[Eman]

LOL!!! Love em' Keith

[keithgood838]

Eman, they say that love makes the world go round;
well I think occasional hefty humour also gives 'this
ball of clay' a few spins:

NOTEWORTHY NOMENCLATURE

Four male citizens of the British Isles are discussing how
they came to be blessed with their respective forenames:
'I'm called George because I was born on St George's Day,'
asserts the Englishman.
'I'm called Andrew because I was born on St Andrew's Day,'
declares the Scotsman.
The Welshman affirms: 'I'm called David because I was born
on St David's Day.'
The Irishman explains: 'I'm called Pancake because ...'

[ROBERT M.]

Does Eman know about our Pancake Day I wonder ?

[keithgood838]

Hi Robert, Pancake Day isn't exclusive to us in Britain;
it is celebrated as part of the Mardi Gras in America.

[keithgood838]

CANINE CAPERS

A Geordie loved his pet dog, so when it died
he decided to have it commemorated in the
form of a gold statue. He went to a local jeweller's
shop and enquired: 'Can ya make me a gold statue
of me dog?'
'Certainly sir,' replied the jeweller, 'would you like
it eighteen carat?'
'No, daft lad, I want it chewin' a bone.'

Our dog has developed the habit of chasing after
people on a bicycle.
I think I shall have to take away his bicycle.

[ROBERT M.]