Today's Joke

[maxine]

[Marian]

Do they still sell Polos?

[Lena & Harry Smith]

I'm not sure Marian, but talking of Mints. I visit a card shop just a short bus ride away from where we live quite regularly, and last week as I was paying for my goods, the shopkeeper a nice Indian man was taking out a mint for himself, and offered me a couple. Perhaps some of you may remember those packets of Wrigleys spearmint chewing gum that had about Six in the packet, and although I thought these had now disappeared like many products have done, I readily took the Two, thanked him and caught the bus outside the shop that was packed with passengers. I was generously offered a seat, sat down and put a mint in my mouth and crikey I couldn't believe what was happening. The strength of these mints could take your head off and I'm not joking. They were lethal, and believe me the air was silently blue. I've heard of hot Chilli pepper contests but they wouldn't want to try these spearmints whatever they were.

[karl]

Marian Polo Mints are still onsale but my favourites are Murray Mints or the new Werther Mints

[maxine]

:

I'm not sure Marian, but talking of Mints. I visit a card shop just a short bus ride away from where we live quite regularly, and last week as I was paying for my goods, the shopkeeper a nice Indian man was taking out a mint for himself, and offered me a couple. Perhaps some of you may remember those packets of Wrigleys spearmint chewing gum that had about Six in the packet, and although I thought these had now disappeared like many products have done, I readily took the Two, thanked him and caught the bus outside the shop that was packed with passengers. I was generously offered a seat, sat down and put a mint in my mouth and crikey I couldn't believe what was happening. The strength of these mints could take your head off and I'm not joking. They were lethal, and believe me the air was silently blue. I've heard of hot Chilli pepper contests but they wouldn't want to try these spearmints whatever they were.

[maxine]

Marian Polo Mints are still onsale but my favourites are Murray Mints or the new Werther Mints

I like extra strong mints ...but must not crunch them ...can fracture teeth so easily these days...

[keithgood838]

CROSS PURPOSES

Customer to shopkeeper: 'Have you got any four-watt,
two-volt bulbs?'
Shopkeeper: 'For what?'
Customer: 'Actually no, two.'
Shopkeeper: 'Two what?'
Customer: 'Yes.'
Shopkeeper: 'No.'

[Lena & Harry Smith]

Not Four candles then Keith

[maxine]

Not Four candles then Keith

all of you

[maxine]

Patient ...doctor i can't pronounce my Fs Ts And Hs ...

Doctor Well... you cant say Fairer Than That then!

[keithgood838]

Maintaining the medical motif, Maxine.
(I do like a bit of alliteration.)

VILLAGE VITALITY

A health specialist is giving a talk on well-being
in the village hall: 'The best way to start the day
is to do five minutes of light exercise, and five minutes
of deep breathing. Then I take a short shower and
feel rosy all over.' A voice from the rear of the hall exclaims:
'Tell us more about Rosie!'

[karl]

Patient ...doctor i can't pronounce my Fs Ts And Hs ...

Doctor Well... you cant say Fairer Than That then!

Good one Maxine.

You like strong mints? I don't think the really strong mints can be good for you, like Victory V's and Fisherman's Friend. My late cousin liked the latter and she gave me one to try, I had to spit it out - yuk!!!!

[Eman]

LOL...good one guys.

Ha ha Karl, guess I know what to ask Santa to bring you..ha ha..

[maxine]

glad you like the joke Karl

[keithgood838]

GRACE UNDER FIRE

A respectful hush had descended on the church as the congregation
waited for the service to commence. Suddenly, to their consternation,
the be-horned figure of Satan, wearing an fearsomely intimidating red cloak
and brandishing a pitchfork, appeared atop the altar steps.
Everyone began screaming and making a desperate dash for the exit
except for an elderly gentleman who stayed calmly in his pew unperturbed
by the presence of God's enemy, evil incarnate.
Satan approached the undaunted old man and asked menacingly:
'Do you know who I am?'
'Yep, I sure do.'
'Aren't you afraid of me?'
'Nope, sure ain't,' he replied convincingly.
'Don't you know that I can kill you with one word?'
'Don't doubt it for a minute.'
'Do you not realise that I can commit you to the fiery agony of hell
for an eternity?' enquired the increasingly frustrated Lucifer.
'Yep.'
'Now are you afraid of me?'
'Nope.'
Finally an exasperated Satan asked:
'Why aren't you afraid of me?'
'Been married to your sister for 62 years.'