(courtesy of Ed in Orlando)
Why do we press harder on a remote control
when we know the batteries are dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds'
when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say
there are four billion stars, yet check when you say
the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do the nameless 'they' use sterilised needles
for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest,
yet ducks when a revolver is thrown at him?
Why do Kamikazi pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an s in lisp?
If humans evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what colour bubble bath you use
the bubbles are always white?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the first end you try?
When someone rams us with a shopping trolley,
why do we say, 'It's all right?' Why do we not say,
'That hurt you stupid idiot?'
In winter, why do we keep the house as warm
as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
Why are there no father-in-law jokes?
Keith

Pedantic postscript: Why do we say, 'You stupid idiot?'