Today's Joke

[maxine]

Didn't Barbara Knox drive her daughter to the police station, as she had also been charged with drink driving?
Then she was charged too!

I remember a member of parliament who came in to the hospital where I worked, with his wife who had a fish bone in her throat, saying "Do you Know who I am?" I don't think it made any difference with his wife's treatment, in fact it might have made her wait longer!

I think Steve Coogan should be called an actor after his part in "Philomena," I was pleasantly surprised!

Marian that is weird as i know somebody who said she said the exact same thing to a builder!....it made me look at her differently thats for sure....it has confirmed the story for me

[Marian]

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a Midwest


Town he planned to visit on his vacation.


He wrote: I would very much like to bring my dog


With me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved.


Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my


Room with me at night?"





An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who wrote:


SIR: "I've been operating this hotel for many years.


In all that time, I've never had a dog steal towels,


Bedclothes, silverware or steal pictures off the walls


Or use them as a coloring book.





I've never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night


For being drunk and disorderly.


And I've never had a dog run out on a hotel bill.


Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel.


And, if your dog will vouch for you, you're welcome to


Stay here, too."

[Lena & Harry Smith]

Very good Marian.

[karl]

Very good Marian.

A few years ago I stayed in a lovely Kimpton hotel in Cambridge Massachusetts, dogs were welcome there and there was even a water bowl at the entrance. I did see a few dogs with their owners coming out of the lifts but they were all well behaved, the owners behaved too!

[Marian]

Thanks all. I have a friend who with her husband runs a B&B in Keswick, in the Lake District. She trains guide dog puppies, I don't how she can let them go when they go to their new owners. Sometimes she takes them back when they become too old work. Her house is even named after one of these she took back - Larry's Lodge.
Of course they welcome dogs to stay.

[Sandra]

What a wonderful couple Marian,how rewarding to train guide dog puppies and then let them go.AND to take some back when they are to old to work.

[Marian]

......And they are big Jack Jones fans too!!!!

[Gray]

[Eman]

love it Marian!

[Marian]

Thank you all!

[john]

Very good Marian.

[maxine]

love it Marian take a bow or a curtsey

[keithgood838]

I love the dog story too, Marian. He truly is man's best friend.
I miss my canine companion now that our erstwhile neighbours
have moved to St Albans. I've had one outing (joyful reunion)
with Coco since they left.

UPWARDLY MOBILE

So I was in my car and driving along (many moons ago)
when my boss phoned: 'You've been promoted,' he exclaimed,
and I swerved.
He rang a second time and purred: 'You've been promoted again.'
I swerved again. He phoned a third time and exclaimed even more
excitedly: 'You're managing director!' And I drove into a tree.
A traffic policeman approached and enquired:
'What happened to you?'
I replied haltingly: 'I careered off the road.'

[karl]

Hmm!, so what branch were you going to be managing director of?

[maxine]

I love the dog story too, Marian. He truly is man's best friend.
I miss my canine companion now that our erstwhile neighbours
have moved to St Albans. I've had one outing (joyful reunion)
with Coco since they left.

UPWARDLY MOBILE

So I was in my car and driving along (many moons ago)
when my boss phoned: 'You've been promoted,' he exclaimed,
and I swerved.
He rang a second time and purred: 'You've been promoted again.'
I swerved again. He phoned a third time and exclaimed even more
excitedly: 'You're managing director!' And I drove into a tree.
A traffic policeman approached and enquired:
'What happened to you?'
I replied haltingly: 'I careered off the road.'

Keith ,...i needed a laugh