The worst songs ever.....what are yours?

Hilary · Post by **Hilary** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 10:48 am

Hi Everyone,

A couple of nights ago Paul Miller, (he presents a radio show that goes out to the Oxford/Berkshire/Southern Counties and Southampton areas!)
asked the listeners to vote for the worst songs ever and from the votes cast he compiled a "bottom twenty" chart and played the songs on his late show.

Anyone listening to the show for the first time would probably think that Paul had "lost it" as the music was.....different to his usual style!
Some of the songs I hadn't heard before, (I wouldn't be too upset if I NEVER heard them again!) and some I did know but the whole show was very entertaining and Paul hopes to do this again soon.

In the "bottom twenty" of the worst songs of all time we had Terry Wogan singing "The Floral dance!" It's a good job that Terry is a better broadcaster than singer......what was going through his mind when he recorded this one?

Max Bygraves was also in there. He was singing about a toothbrush!
Other than the number one song, which we shall mention in a minute, the song that just blew me away because it was so bad was by someone called Tiny Tim and he was singing a song about Tulips!
I couldn't believe my ears........his voice was so high that he could have been a she!

Well here it is everyone the worst song of all time as voted for by the listeners to the Paul Miller late show.
It was Keith Harris and "Orville's song." I think this song received so many votes that they couldn't count them all.
I'm not surprised really as it was AWFUL. It's hard to believe that anyone would want to buy this record but I guess it was popular at the time!

So, what would be your worst song of all time.
Would they be the ones mentioned above

or do you have any other songs that drive you mad!

At the moment, "smile" by Lily Allen is driving me mad as it is played on the radio a lot and I think that this song will be in the "bottom twenty" in the near future. Never mind Lily, it's nothing to worry about......I'm just having a "whine and a moan!"

mariana44 · Post by **mariana44** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 11:26 am

Hi Hilary---there are some truly awful songs about--although what some call awful, some people like--well, they must do I guess as none of them would sell.

The record by Tiny Tim was called "Tiptoe through the tulips" and he was a very bizarre character, he had long wavy hair, and white make up--which for then was quite unusual.There was some kind of controversy over him--he married a very young girl--may have been his cousin, I cannot remember clearly. I also have a feeling that he is no longer with us!!

As for Max Bygraves--"I'm a pink toothbrush, you're a blue toothbrush"---takes me back to "Childrens Hour" on the radio every Saturday Morning!!

My most hated record has come up before in one of Robert's subjects, but because I dislike it so much I will include it here too--it is "Cinderella Rockerfella" by Esther and Abi Ofarim--my friend [!!], would always put it on the juke box ,because she knew I hated it!!

I think there are quite a few recordings that will come in, under this category!!

Marian

Lena & Harry Smith · Post by **Lena & Harry Smith** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 3:04 pm

Hi Hilary, we remember all the ones here, Terry's Floral Dance and Tiny Tim and what about that other one of Max Bygraves then.
"Why does Everybody Call Me Bighead"

but one that immediately springs to mind and drives us barmy is Lulu with " You Know It Makes Me Wanna SHOUT YEAH SHOUT

Well it makes us wanna .......Scream
Another one we remember was Bernard Bresslaw who starred in the Carry On films and made a recording of " Don't Jump Off The Roof Dad" you'll make a hole in the yard.

And there's more..

ROBERT M. · Post by **ROBERT M.** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 3:59 pm

Hello all. I like the Bernard Bresslaw song Lena and Harry

Tiny Tim passed away in 1996 aged 74 after having a heart attack while singing "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" (honest). His marriage was controversial because he married a 17 year old girl, live on Johnny Carsons the "Tonight Show" . The marriage produced one daughter named...............................................yes Tulip!!

mariana44 · Post by **mariana44** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 4:36 pm

Hi all-and what about Arthur Mullard and Hylda Baker" singing "You're the one that I want". John and Olivia they ain't !!!

Marian

paul jh · Post by **paul jh** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 9:51 pm

I agree with you Hilary on Lily Allen's Smile. At first I liked it a bit (with the bad words omitted), but no longer. Her new one (LDN) is just as bad.

Here are four more recent songs that are just awful, two by The Streets: When You Wasn't Famous and Never Went To Church, and two by the Pussycat Dolls: Beep and Buttonz. Also anything by the Black Eyed Peas is just plain lousy.
Going back a few years, one of the worst songs ever is: I Don't Want To Miss A Thing by Aerosmith. If that's playing in a store or restaurant, I leave the place as quickly as possible.

Then from the 1970s, I just hate YMCA by the Village People. It's the only disco song I don't like.

Yesterday Sarah Kennedy played Venus in Blue Jeans by Mark Wynter from 1962 and it was pretty awful.

And going way back, I think (I'll Be With You In) Apple Blossom Time by the Andrews Sisters is one of the worst songs and recordings ever, of that wonderful period of great songs of the 1930s and 1940s. It's just a bad apple.

Lena & Harry Smith · Post by **Lena & Harry Smith** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 12:39 am

Marian, That recording of "You're The One That I Want "with Arthur Mullard and Hylda Baker. Should never have been allowed should it.

We remember Arthur Mullard very well before we had the misfortune of seeing him on our screens. For years he worked as doorman at the Odeon cinema in Edgware Road here in London dressed in uniform complete with peak cap, took his job very seriously and God help anyone who upset him. Well we suspect he was on very few Christmas lists.
Robert, we are sure lots of people liked Bernard Bresslaw, and whats more we made a bloomer.

It wasn't Bernard Bresslaw who sang " Don't Jump Off The Roof Dad" it was Tommy Cooper, not that it made the song any better, but what about the other songs by Bernard Making Mad Passionate Love. and "You Need Feet"

Paul, Y.M.C.A. The Village People has been one of the most popular party and holiday songs that we can remember, and the good looking Mark Wynter was always one of my favourites, still working and recently appeared in London, and I'll Be With You In Apple Blossom Time was one of the Andrew Sisters biggest hits and another recording that we like.
It's good to read of different choices and thoughts though.

ROBERT M. · Post by **ROBERT M.** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 12:52 am

Paul, I hate being picky but I like a few of the songs you mentioned, especially Aerosmith, Village People (a fun song), The Andrews Sisters (nice melodic tune) and very very especially Mark Wynters "Venus In Blue Jeans" a great "pop" song from the early 60's

(Edit) - Lena and Harry seem to be agreeing with me on three of the songs.

paul jh · Post by **paul jh** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 12:57 am

I was hoping that the UK was spared the dreadful YMCA. But I just noticed it made #1 on the UK charts. I believe it only made #2 on the US charts! Please tell me that it's not played by DJs or annoying cover bands at weddings in the UK.

YMCA, along with the Electric Slide by Marcia Griffiths, has been completely overplayed at wedding receptions in the US. Another one that really tires me out is Etta James' At Last. The bride and groom often dance their "first dance" to that song. I can tolerate that song by Nat King Cole, Doris Day, or Glenn Miller Orchestra, but something about the Etta James version bothers me. Please tell me that your wedding receptions are not including YMCA, Electric Slide, and At Last.

ROBERT M. · Post by **ROBERT M.** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:10 am

Paul, I don't know so much about being played at "wedding receptions". In Britain we have "night time do's" which are celebration parties people have, and invite family and friends to, when celebrating "special birthdays" 18th 21st 40th 50th 60th etc.... and special "wedding anniversary do's" at which all the popular disco hits are played along with well known romantic ballads were people can have a "smooch" together ie.. dancing slowly with arms wrapped round each other in an embrace. That took a bit of explaining Paul, hope you get the idea

paul jh · Post by **paul jh** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:23 am

Thanks for the explanation. But there was an American-style wedding reception in the film Four Weddings And A Funeral. Perhaps that took place in Scotland. Don't you have similar "wedding receptions" in England?

Okay, I'll give you the Venus in Blue Jeans song. It's probably not that bad. But the others are just terrible. I simply can't understand how a Matt Monro fan would like such an awful song as I Don't Want To Miss A Thing or YMCA. But that's the beauty of music ... everyone has their own loves and preferences.

ROBERT M. · Post by **ROBERT M.** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:35 am

I cannot help with the "Four Weddings and a Funeral" information as I don't think I have seen the film, well not all the way through anyway. If anyone else can help??

Paul, Aerosmith and the Village people songs are not my favourite songs, but I cannot say I truly dislike them either, like you apparently do.

mariana44 · Post by **mariana44** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 9:59 am

Hi all--just to join in this debate. We all know over here that YMCA is a great party song--guaranteed to get every one on the floor. Plus I also like "Venus in Blue Jeans" with Mark Wynter.

I was very , very young when The Andrews sisters were popular, so they have this nostalgic sound for me, and I really liked "I'll be with you in apple blossom time"

Has anyone heard the Puppini Sisters -They have an Andrews sisters sound, and look, from my cd cover. They are on the Sharon Osborne Show this week--today or tomorrow. Missed the first couple as I did not realise they were on, so not really sure what this programme is going to be like. I know she has Chico on tomorrow

There you go---another awful song "-It's Chico time"--but someone bought it as it went to number one-I think they must all have been under-10's--that's years--not dress-size

Marian

Lena & Harry Smith · Post by **Lena & Harry Smith** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 10:21 am

Hi Paul, as Marian has explained that YMCA gets everyone up and joining in, and you can't understand how any Matt Monro fan would like it, well it won't be their favourite song, but we wouldn't mind laying a bet that Matt's biggest fans such as Michele and Matt and Mickie too have done likewise

and enjoyed it.

Hilary · Post by **Hilary** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 11:04 am

Hi Everyone,

What a lot of GOOD songs and singers we have here!

Lena and Harry - I agree with you about Lulu's song.
I don't really like her much as a singer anyway - She is a much better radio presenter I think!

Paul - I have heard that "YMCA" is played at line dancing clubs!
Looks like this song will never go away and will remain in our hearts forever!

Anything by Britney Spears drives me crazy as her voice doesn't sound real to me! I am sure that Britney is a nice person but....oh that voice of hers!

What about the "Frog Chorus" and Paul McCartney then!
This song was also played on the Paul Miller show along with "the birdie song" by the Tweets"!! yes, two great classic songs that we are very proud of!